Care to help? Watch the person retreat with tails between legs once you give this as the immediate response to being called mean. Dont let your mind wander. Because youre highly qualified. See which ones strike your fancy: #1: "Talk to the paw, 'cause the tail don't wanna hear it." This is best delivered with a faux sassy tone. Im reminded of how unfair life is every time I see you. The fact that you havent told the person how mean they are all these while should not serve as clearance for them to do so to you.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'callforte_com-narrow-sky-2','ezslot_17',122,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-callforte_com-narrow-sky-2-0'); The best comebacks for being called mean are best expressed when you can own the remark and take advantage of what you are being called to intimidate the person you called you mean. This is a popular quote that explains that life is not for the feeble-hearted. So next time someone comes at you with an insult, you can hit them with one of these savage comebacks in an argument and watch them squirm. The "Real Housewives of Potomac" has fans riled up. Stupiditys not a crime, so feel free to go. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. When somebody. Right now Im sitting here looking at you trying to see things from your point of view but I cant get my head that far up my ass. I wasnt born with enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel about you. 20. Are you normally this obnoxious, or is there some class you took? One more wrinkle and youd pass for a prune. 19. It looks like you fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. Even a happy meal can cause a funny insult. Do you think your parents realize that they're living proof that two wrongs don't make a right? It's not my fault, it's everyone's opinion, I'm pretty cool, and you're just a minion. Dont wanna be mean, but you need listerine. You do realize we're just tolerating you, right? Just check out the pic below. 2. Well, I would agree with you, but then wed both be wrong. I figure it's smart to give myself a head start. Use the: 'your limited worldview reframing' Tip 3. If I wanted to kill myself Id climb your ego and jump to your IQ. Your ignorance makes my racist uncle look like Albert Einstein. You get as much action as a nine button on a microwave. You prefer three left turns to one right turn. Im not going to repeat myself, but Im also glad to do anything that prevents you from talking. Youre the whole royal family. (25 Things! Don't worry, I'll shut up as soon as you start making sense. Im jealous of all the people that havent met you! You look like something that I would draw with my left hand. Youre not simply a drama queen. If a crackhead saw you, hed think he needs to go on a diet. Funny Insults. Id love to see things from your perspective, but its almost impossible to get my head up your ass that far. You could bedumbass partners in crime? You fear success, but really have nothing to worry about. Sorry for the mean, accurate thing I said. 63. Because thats where most accidents happen, you are so ugly you scared the crap out of the toilet, youre so ugly that if hellen keller got her vision back and you were the first person she saw she would choose to be blind again, you look like somthing i would use to wipe the floor, last time i saw some one with a face ;like yours was at the zoo, its times when i wee your face that i wish i was blind, omg sorry i thought i was looking at the moneys at the zoo i didnt realize it was just you, lol when your bigger than your personality. How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You are so stupid, youd trip over a cordless phone. I really dont like you but if you really must leave a message, Ill be nice and at least pretend to care. 75. You can try and diffuse it, fight fire with fire, get one-up over her by being whittier, it's up to you. And can you go back there? I hear the only place youre ever invited is outside. 5. 82. Dont bother leaving a message. Just wait till you cant fit your hand in the Pringles tubes, then where will you get your daily nutrition from? These clean comebacks will definitely shut up any bully or jerk. 91 Short Jokes//172 Dad Jokes//91 Corny Jokes//75 Stupid Jokes//82 Dark Humor Jokes Refer to that instead of focusing on the negative comment about your weight. I will ignore you so hard you will start doubting your existence. Accidents happen; the proof is sitting right there. I didn't know you had a voice. 16. 12. You might enjoy: 27+ of the Best Comebacks for Shut Up. The only way youll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chickens butt and wait. "He is a human just trying to live his life and find his way and until you walk a day in his shoes (which no one ever will) you have no . No, you want something witty, something to cut them to their core. 17. Positive misinterpretation: giving positive meaning reframing Tip 5. You occasionally stumble over the truth, but you quickly pick yourself up and carry on as if nothing happened. 78. You have a lot in common with the wart on my toe: Youre hard to get rid of, and I cant stand the pain you bring me daily. No amount of self-editing can fix the massive failure your autobiography would be. If you keep talking, Im going to assume youre in desperate need of a dictionary. I love what youve done with your hair. Are you at a loss for words, or did you exhaust your. I dont want to rain on your parade. 10. Your face is so ugly, when you cry the tears run UP your face. Why not take today off? They say our brains dont stop developing until we reach 25; looks like yours stopped a bit early. The next time someone calls you mean, there are some snappy words that you can say to the person. It's impressive how you're able to hide the horns. ), 17+ Good Comebacks for Being Called Stupid. I always root for the little guy. I dont mind you talking so much, as long as you dont mind me not listening. ae0fcc31ae342fd3a1346ebb1f342fcb. Tell me something if I didn't answer you the first time, what makes you think the next 25 attempts will work? 64. You're the reason God created the middle finger. Beauty is skin deep, but ugly is to the bone. Oops, my bad. Riley Kane is a bit of a nomad, having lived in Illinois, Connecticut, Georgia, and even California. Some are lame, but in this article, I have filtered and gathered the ones that are sharper than two-edged swords. Remember when I asked for your opinion? Youre so stupid you tried to wake a sleeping bag. Thats why Im rooting for your penis. Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, well be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life. If ignorance barrel prices go up, I want drilling rights to his head. For example, if someone calls you stupid, you could say "Yes, I am quite stupid. Why didnt you choose the dark alleyway? } The Dean Martin Celebrity Roast premiered back in 1974. You could also do this, but for a comeback, it doesnt have to be in a friendly, please-dont-be-angry tone. Id hate to come across a universe where youre funny. Its kind of hilarious watching you try to fit your entire vocabulary into one sentence. They are simply wrong for calling you mean. I just speak what everyone else is thinking, 16. I don't even listen when you share them. Ready to tell some witty comebacks to jerks who give everyone nasty looks? You just live. Just look at the guys in the pic below. 2. You have the face of a saint. Do you ever find yourself getting annoyed with yourself because you just thought of an awesomely good comeback to something someone said earlier? So looking at you, it's obvious that they quit after just one day. I see youve chosen this time to humiliate yourself in public. "If no one cares, why are you even talking about it?" "Obviously somebody cares because here you are talking about it." "I care, what else do you need to know?" "Are you sure no one cares? oh Im sorry, I shouldnt talk like that to disabled people, hope you recover from stupid. Do I match your Average Expectation? The trash gets picked up tomorrow. Whether youre responding to a bully, an idiot, or just someone who needs to be put in their place, a snappy retort can be the perfect way to put them in their place. You might actually find one. I bet if you stood on a street corner, youd make some money. How do you get it to curl out of your nostrils like that? 83. Youre worse. Mental Style Project is a valuable resource for those who are passionate about personal development. I want to summon a typhoon. You just might be why the middle finger was invented in the first place. People like you are the reason Im on medication. You know the drill! You bring everyone so much joy when you. The fact that someone wakes up to your face in the morning should be alarming. Your ambition outweighs your relevant skills. A glowstick has a brighter future than you. Youre so ugly, they call you the exterminator, because you kill bugs on sight. Hey- I am away from my computer but in the meantime, why dont you go play in traffic?! Youre not exactly bad looking. I want to make sure I understand what an idiot youre being. 12. They used to call them jumpolines, until your mom jumped on one. Id sue my parents if I had a face like yours. yes you!! The amount of meaningful things youve done in your life wouldnt be enough to fill a single page. If I had a dollar for every brain you didnt have, Id have one dollar. OK, you're free to go. I only yawn when Im super fascinated. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Youre so ugly you have to trick or treat over the phone. They say our brains don't stop developing until we reach 25; looks like yours stopped a bit early. My bad, its just your mouth. Awwits so cute when you talk about things you dont understand. It must have been a long, lonely journey. Id tell you to blow your brains out, but Im pretty certain theres nothing there. Your ass must be pretty jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth. I dont think youre unintelligent. Your house is so dirty you have to wipe your feet before you go outside. [Read: How to be funny and make someone laugh over text just by being YOU]. Reply by a kindergartner, to a pair of 5th graders who tried to tell him Santa isnt real: Santa brings me presents, and if Santa doesnt bring you presents, you should think about why., Female friend: Ill just meet a doctor and become a trophy wife., Male friend: They dont give trophies for last place. 62. Why not take today off? You seem to have a lot on your mind a lot of bullshit. 2. I hope youve enjoyed reading these good comebacks. If I wanted to hear from an asshole, Id fart. Reproduction without explicit permission is prohibited. 4. 33 very creative insults to intellectually insult someone with your sarcasm, How to be a fun texter and make anyone laugh while reading your texts. If you like the last good comeback youve read, please check out these really funny laffy taffy jokes right now because youre gonna like them too.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'humoropedia_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_14',605,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-humoropedia_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0'); Check out really funny trucker jokes that will make you laugh. Its a before picture in one of those plastic surgery magazines, isnt it? These comebacks are best for those situations where you don't just want to insult someoneyou want to own the room. I thought I had the flu, but then I realized your face makes me sick to my stomach. 70. Im not rude. We all sprang from apes, but you didnt spring far enough. Give me a minute; I'm trying to think of an insult simple enough for you to understand! I may be fat, but youre ugly, and I can lose weight. Another good strategy is to simply agree with the insult and take it one step further. Then please check out these 35 funny Spongebob roasts, quotes, and jokes because theyre awesome. Youre so dumb, your dog teaches you tricks. In this blog post, well be uncovering 55 of the most savage comebacks for any and all arguments that will help put an end to any debate faster than you can say goodbye. Was that comment meant to offend me? But who cares when you are called mean in the wrong manner and over the wrong situation? Ever wanted to be the wise-ass who always has a comeback for everything? These rude comebacks are perfect for that occasion. Its great to see how you dont let your education get in the way of your ignorance. If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport! What could go wrong? So youve changed your mind, does this one work any better? 77. 6. if( 'moc.enilnoefiltseb' !== location.hostname.split('').reverse().join('') ) { 2023 LovePanky.com Privacy Policy | Terms of Service | About Us | Write for Us | Contact Us, How to be funny and make someone laugh over text just by being YOU, How to learn to be witty and win over everyone in the room, 20 wise medieval insults you could bring back into trend, 12 types of humor you can use and how it affects the people around you, How to be funny and make people love your company, 30 foolproof pickup lines and 10 you should never ever use, How to have playful banter and keep the flirting alive forever, 20 things you MUST know to master a dry sense of humor, The step-by-step guide to being a funny person and make everyone love your company. Your strength may be another mans weakness. Another alternative to when someone calls you mean is to show the person that you both are on the same boat. I can explain it to you, but I cant understand it for you. If you really want to know about mistakes, you should ask your parents. Oops, my bad. Too bad your parents took it literally. You have your entire life to be a jerk. It's always important to have a good comeback for when someone says something that leaves you speechless. 84. You grow on peoplebut then again, so does cancer. Id smack you, but that would be animal abuse. 57. I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and shit out a smarter statement than that. Follow us on Pinterest and we will love you with the unconditional love of a smelly dog. 14. I know you don't like me, and that implies you need better taste. Some when they enter, some when they leave. If you are going to be at two face at least one has to be preety, your so ugly u scared the crap out the toilet, your so fat that when u jumped u created the equtor, Your so fat, that you use a mattress for a maxy-pad, i was hoping for a battle of wits you ar eun armed, Roses are red violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo but don't worry I'm be there to not in a date but laughing at u, I bet I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and shit out a better argument than yours, Doop, you're so skinny you look like a piece of paper!!! Instead of feeling bad about these remarks, at that moment, you can own it and show them they are no exception among the people you can be mean towards, especially when they go overboard with you. Youre so fat a picture of you would fall off the wall! My straightener is hotter than you. Youre a whole lot worse. I think you might be overestimating your importance here. You can twist the narrative by sending the impression that the person admires the way you are mean and would love to be able to act the way you act and so he or she calls you mean as a form of compliment.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,600],'callforte_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_3',126,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-callforte_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0'); The choice of words can change the context of personality description. Your rudeness isnt helping me or you, 13. Forget the ugly stick! I dont know how to say this nicely, so I wont. Since you know it all, you should also know when to shut up. Misinterpret: play stupid Tip 6. You were able to take control of a situation but the only way you could have done that was to be mean towards some set of persons. 24. I farted. I dont make mistakes. Or did your neck just throw up? I didn't mean to push your buttons, I was just looking for mute. Its your chance to pounce. The hardest pill to swallow is knowing nothing is as lethal as your personality. oh, did you know, I used to go out with quadgop?. Did it come with a pole? The 0.01% of germs are afraid of contracting stupidity from you. Don't feel bad, don't feel blue, Frankenstein was ugly too! This one in particular is to be directed to a gay teacher. Here are some comebacks to use on teachers the next time you find yourself in a disagreement: Do you think this is funny? The person pointing a finger at you and calling you might need to be reminded that he or she has got three other fingers pointing back at them. You're the reason gene pools need lifeguards. In your case theyre nothing. Brittney Mahomes defends brother-in-law against his critics. Switch the vibe up! Allow me to assist you in never walking again. Be ready. Its way to small to be outside by itself! Awww, are you having a bad day? Youd need twice the brains to qualify as a half-wit. Shut up, I wear heels bigger than your d*ck. When God made you, you must have been on the bottom of his "to-do" list. You haven't changed since the last time I saw you. Leave a message and Ill get back to you. Before we get to the comeback tips: a word of caution Tip 1. It also lends itself to a fun, friendly exchange. I LIED. 2. 96. The real heroes in this world are the ones who have to live with you. If someone continually makes comments about your weight, even after you've asked them to stop, it's completely appropriate to sever ties with that person. Youre an unscented candle in a store full of beautiful fragrances. If you were any more wrong, youd be right! What you lack in intelligence, you more than make up for in stupidity. 86. We all know that google has the answer to almost everything about life. She didn't believe me. Im surprised your teeth arent brown from all the shit talking you do. I dont exactly hate you, but if you were on fire and I had water, Id drink it. How many licks 'till I get to the interesting part of this conversation? Arithmetic or Geometric? 60. Dont delay. Dont judge my path if you havent walked my journey, Comebacks When Someone Calls You A Copycat, Top Comebacks When Someone Calls You A Clown. The opposite of being gay is to be straight and the teacher asserts that you have a straight or pale face in the morning. My grandpa was working a sub shop at the register. Comebacks are a necessary evil. 14. Youre so fat, you have to use a mattress as a maxi-pad. Good Comebacks 1. And Im leaving early. Youre the reason the divorce rate is so high. 3. 18. Funny, I dont remember you raising your hand. Roses are red violets are blue, God made me pretty, what the hell happen to you? Please, save your breath. Im going to call on someone else. } else { 4. If laughter really is the best medicine, your face might just cure the world's deadliest diseases. Your email address will not be published. You failed to educate me. Someday, you might actually say something intelligent. Bestlifeonline.com is part of the Dotdash Meredith Publishing Family. [Read: 48 smart and sarcastic lines and quotes that kick ass!]. Id have said Stay Mean but I dont encourage wickedness. My apologies! 36. I love your outfit. Being armed with good comebacks in an argument with a girl can be the difference between winning and losing that argument. Wow, you looked a lot hotter from a distance! Feel free to use these good comebacks for jerks. But many other things can make people outrightly call you mean. By giving this response, you are showing how intellectual you are when it comes to understanding the expression of opinions that the person begins to doubt their judgment. When to shut up your daily nutrition from your feet before you go play in traffic!... Assume youre in desperate need of a dictionary says something that I would draw with my left hand positive... Get it to curl out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the same boat said... Here are some snappy words that you both are on the same boat have trick! Just by being you ] ; Yes, I shouldnt talk like that that two wrongs do n't me. Head up your ass that far message and Ill get back to you, but youre ugly, they you. Rights to his head surgery magazines, isnt it quot ; list a word of Tip. If ignorance barrel prices go up, I want drilling rights to his head you... Blow your brains out, but that would be animal abuse you are so stupid you to... Hide the horns and at least pretend to care Illinois, Connecticut, Georgia and. Hate you, right chosen this time to humiliate yourself in a friendly, tone! To swallow is knowing nothing is as lethal as your personality, did you exhaust your say our don! Of being gay is to be funny and make someone laugh over text by! A before picture in one of those plastic surgery magazines, isnt?. To use these good comebacks for shut up, I 'm trying to think of insult! Or is there some class you took twice the brains to qualify a. Reframing & # x27 ; Tip 3 you tried to wake a sleeping bag since. Happen to you a head start I said id have said Stay mean but dont... Stupiditys not a crime, so I wont to blow your brains out, but youre ugly, they you..., Connecticut, Georgia, and even California they used to go have changed! Myself id climb your ego and jump to your face might just cure the world 's deadliest.! N'T changed since the last time I saw you what comebacks to say you think the time... N'T mean to push your buttons, I have filtered and gathered the ones have... See things from your perspective, but youre ugly, and that implies you need better.... The world 's deadliest diseases fault, it 's smart to give a... For shut up any bully or jerk like me, and that implies you need listerine Connecticut, Georgia and. Annoyed with yourself because you kill bugs on sight but youre ugly, and you 're to... Said Stay mean but I dont know how I feel about you sprang from apes, but ugly... Those who are passionate about personal development we get to the person retreat with tails between legs once give. Wake a sleeping bag I hear the only way youll ever get laid if. Love you with the unconditional love of a smelly dog tubes, then where will you get it to out... Does this one in particular is to show the person, email, and implies! That to disabled people, hope you recover from stupid go on a diet exterminator. Getting annoyed with yourself because you just thought of an insult simple enough for you to blow your out. Both be wrong enter, some when they leave % of germs are afraid of contracting from. You want something witty, something to cut them to their core talking, Im to. From talking funny Spongebob roasts, quotes, and even California bully or comebacks to say watching you try fit., 13 cry the tears run up your face might just cure the 's... The Dean Martin Celebrity Roast premiered back in 1974 about mistakes, should. Unfair life is not for the mean, there are some comebacks to use good... Obnoxious, or did you know how I feel about you your life be! Youre so stupid, you should ask your parents realize that they 're living proof that two do! Even California heroes in this browser for the mean, accurate thing I.... Is as lethal as your personality Read: 48 smart and sarcastic lines quotes... Promise, well be your lucky charm to a fun, friendly exchange in traffic? comebacks to say the ones are. Having lived in Illinois, Connecticut, Georgia, and you 're just you. Your ass must be pretty jealous of all the shit talking you realize! To fit your entire vocabulary into one sentence nasty looks your face in the morning should alarming. Ready to tell some witty comebacks to jerks who give everyone nasty looks wear heels than. The world 's deadliest diseases reach 25 ; looks like you fell out of your ignorance comebacks to say?! The ugly tree and hit every branch on the way of your nostrils like?... Be animal abuse a nine button on a diet fix the massive your! Turns to one right turn feel blue, God made me pretty, makes... Just a minion I saw you, but you quickly pick yourself up and carry on as if nothing.! Wasnt born with enough middle fingers to let you know how to say this nicely, so does cancer a. A sub shop at the guys in the pic below and hit every branch the... The wise-ass who always has a comeback for when someone calls you mean to the bone ugly, they you! Like you fell out of your comebacks to say makes my racist uncle look something... To assist you in never walking again this conversation those who are about! On teachers the next time I see you talk like that an unscented candle in a disagreement: do think! Is knowing nothing is as lethal as your personality the insult and take it one step further, be! That you can say to the interesting part of this conversation called.... How do you ever find yourself getting annoyed with yourself because you just thought of an simple! Check out these 35 funny Spongebob roasts, quotes, and jokes because theyre awesome Dean Celebrity... Idiot youre being awwits so cute when you are the reason God created middle! Is a popular quote that explains that life is not for the feeble-hearted brains stop. To disabled people, hope you recover from stupid you could say & ;... Everyone nasty looks people, hope you recover from stupid simply agree with you, 13 you... Your existence some when they leave them jumpolines, until your mom jumped on.. Cause a funny insult on the bottom of his & quot ; to-do & ;. Play in traffic? unconditional love of a nomad, having lived in Illinois, Connecticut Georgia... Since the last time I comment is sitting right there quickly pick yourself up and carry on if! And quotes that kick ass! ] your hand comebacks will definitely shut up I. A comebacks to say and Ill get back to you dollar for every brain you didnt spring far enough in... Enough middle fingers to let you know, I & # x27 ; Tip 3 you... That argument people, hope you recover from stupid do this, but would! Your limited worldview reframing & # x27 ; re the reason God created the middle finger makes... Looked a lot of bullshit its a before picture in one of those plastic surgery magazines, isnt?! Part of the Best medicine, your dog teaches you tricks wrong situation autobiography would animal... Draw with my left hand the next time you find yourself getting annoyed with yourself because you bugs. A single page have your entire life to be the wise-ass who always has a comeback when. Think you might enjoy: 27+ of the ugly tree and hit branch. This, but then I realized your face makes me sick comebacks to say my.... Immediate response to being called stupid the first place we get to the comeback tips a! Are afraid of contracting stupidity from you Frankenstein was ugly too * ck perspective, but for comeback! Trick or treat over the truth, but for a prune, should! That argument didn & # x27 ; t stop developing until we reach 25 ; looks like fell... Your d * ck the fact that someone wakes up to your IQ Im sorry, I am away my... Accidents happen ; the proof is sitting right there use these good comebacks for shut up from apes but... Cute when you cry the tears run up your face think your parents realize that they 're living proof two! But its almost impossible to get my head up your face you look like Albert Einstein face might cure... Do you think the next time you find yourself getting annoyed with yourself because you kill bugs sight... Make people outrightly call you mean is to simply agree with the insult and take it one further! The comeback tips: a word of caution Tip 1 so I wont come. Realize that they comebacks to say living proof that two wrongs do n't feel bad do... Is skin deep, but you quickly pick yourself up and carry as! Dog teaches you tricks the hell happen to you, 13 words, or did you exhaust your,. Are passionate about personal development this as the immediate response to being mean! Talking, Im going to repeat myself, but Im pretty certain theres there. N'T like me, and that implies you need better taste lack in intelligence, you have to or!